Friday Funny
 

Once upon a time a guy aked a girl "Will you Marry me?"


The Girl replied "NO!"



And the guy lived happily ever after, worked on his car all he wanted, pissed with the lid down, scratched anytime he wanted too, played golf, went fishing and hunting, came and went as he pleased and Farted anytime he needed to.


THE END :thumbsup:

The funny thing is I STILL do most of those things GF present or not. :eek:

If she is your girlfriend, then here's a joke JUST FOR YOU!!!


Ya know what kills a girlfriends sex drive?


















WEDDING CAKE.

Cosigning on a home-loan will also do this :rolleyes:

Anything you need to talk about, Jim? :_paranoid

Why are wedding dresses white??













'cos they match with the cooker, fridge & washing machine lol :yes:

A man runs into the house yelling "Honey, pack your bags, I just won the lottery!!"





She says "Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?!?"






He says "I don't care, just get out!"

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great
seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she
liked the experience.

"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all
the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each
other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the
game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the
quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!

If you will note, the joke was if the Girl said "NO"!


Mine said yes. Poor thing, she had no idea what she was getting herself into.

I guess that goes for most of our women LOL. Maybe they think it is really good when we are working on our cars so they can be by themselves.

Jan

Cheating on your wife
 

Three men die and go to heaven. When they get to the pearly
gates, St. Peter asks them each one question: "How many times
have you cheated on your wife?"

The first one answers "Never!" St. Peter checks the books,
discovers the man is correct and gives him a Rolls-Royce to
drive during his stay in heaven.

The second man answers "Oh, about 25-30 times." He is given a
Ford Pinto and sent on his way.

The third man answers "Maybe 400-500 times" and is assigned a
bicycle. A few months later, the three meet up and the Pinto
driver, and the bicycle rider notice the Rolls-Royce man has a
long drawn-out sad look on his face. Puzzled, the other two
query him as to "why the sad face?".

Mr. Rolls just looked at them and said, "I just saw my wife,
she was on a skateboard!"

:eek: :D

ding ... ding ... ding ... ding ... and the winner is...... JAN!




~Theresa~
:thumbsup: