Your 'stimulus check'

[Mick Mc]

I saw this and thought I would share.

It will be interesting to see where this goes, different fourms different directions.


This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is
a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and
A format:


Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?

A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition
TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by
spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China .

If you spend it on gasoline, it will go to the Arabs.

If you purchase a computer, it will go to India .

If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras ,
and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).

If you buy a car, it will go to Japan .

If you purchase useless crap, it will go to Taiwan .

If you pay your credit cards off, it will go to bank management bonuses,
and they will hide it offshore.

Same with stock investment.

Instead, you can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales,
going to a baseball game, or spending it on prostitutes, beer and wine
(domestic ONLY), or tattoos, (and Bend Tech software) since those are the only American
businesses still operating in the U.S.



Let the fun begin



Mick