As further reinforcement for the fact that EVERYTHING should be hot rodded, I offer the following:
Poor little Phoebe, my Portuguese Water Dog developed a hematoma in her left ear. The vet operated on her while I was out of town. I came home to find the pooch bumbling around in this giant, one-size-fits-all cone. Of course, the purpose of that cone is to keep her from scratching her ear.
As a by-product, that cone also serves as a canine torture device. From the little plastic pointy things that dig into her neck, to the obscene proportions that caused her to bump into absolutely everything, it became clear to me--as a hot rodder--that something should be done. Tha ridiculous cone was the size of NASA radar dish. Something HAD to be done!
Their I stood, armed with a pair of sharp scissors, a tape gun and a Sharpie marker. The wife was understandably nervous. Mary had that look of horror before. She once came out to the garage to find me performing a "tail chop" on her brand new, perfectly good Ducati Monster. When she inquired, my response was: "Because stock sucks!"
With a trim here, some tape there and a few test fits, the cone now fits her perfectly. The pooch can even make her way up stairs without incident. And the Sharpie? Her cone is now custom lettered for that personalized touch.
Even the dog understands: Stock sux!
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Steve Chryssos
When I lived in NYC I adopted an English Pointer from the North Shore Animal League (great organization). He had injured his tail by wagging vigorously and whacking it on the walls of his kennel and it just wouldn't heal. So I took him to the vet to have his tail docked. When he came home he was wearing a cone as well. The problem was that it was the dead of winter and when he would go outside any time he bent forward to sniff while walking the cone would catch in the snow. That would pull the cone, and his head, driven by the weight and momentum of his body down into the snow. He'd come up with his head being the centerpiece of a k-9 snowcone. Pretty funny, but it required some "hot-rodding" as well.
BTW, as a Portagee, I can say that PWD's are cool dogs, and like all Portagee's, good looking.
went through that cone thing a bunch of times....I have had all my dogs ears clipped and they all come home with the cone! They run into everything....
There are two old men sitting on the front porch watching a dog licking his balls. The first old guy says "Gee, I wish I could to that". The second one says in his southern drawl "He'd BITE you".
Brian Hobaugh SCCA National Tour June 2014
First Hemi 'Cuda Convertible Ever Built
Short clips: Goodguys Pleasanton autocross and pit videos
Stock Sux! Further Evidence
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