A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before
Thanksgiving and says,” I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell
you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is
enough."
"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
" We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each
other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.
"Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of
this," She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father:
"You are NOT getting divorced". Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife " Okay," he says,” they’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way!!!"
I have been laughing for a week on this one, I can just picture this.
Two South Alabama Rednecks (also known as LA rednecks) were walking into one of their houses. On the porch, set one of em's hound dog just lickin' away at his go-nads.
They both stopped, one said, "Man. I wish I could do that"
The other one said, "That dog would bite yoouuuu!"
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Divorce
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