Dude, I feel your pain. My brand new GM ZZ454 crate motor spun a rod bearing after 2000 miles at the RTTC event a few months ago. If anybody heard a ticking at the event, that was me, I call it. While people got to parade their cars around the track, I got to watch mine get towed home. Motor of course had to come out. Same results as you, all the hard parts were okay and only the bearings needed to be replaced and the crank polished. It's all back together now. I checked clearances on its way back together in my garage and everything checked out okay so I'm still not sure what caused it. It's had a 6000rpm rev limiter on it since day 1. I took the time to break it in properly, oil prime it, etc. Maybe the engine just somehow didn't break-in properly, oil shortage, bad luck, GM sucks, I suck, I hate cars, etc. I installed an Accusump system so I shouldn't be able to blame it on oil shortage when(not if) it happens again.
So buying a new GM crate motor with a warranty doesn't mean jack sh_t. And then there's my new Bowtie Overdrive Level 3 200 4R that has vented fluid out of the plastic vent tube from day 1(they're still puzzled by that one). The pressure readings look good in all gears(since day 1) and the fluid level is dead on, so I'm most likely going to have to drive to their facility and have them figure out what the problem is. That might have to come out also, who knows. Maybe it's something simple(not with my luck). My new AGR steering box blew up after 50 miles and burned fluid into my pricey ceramic-coated headers, and that was after it had already gone back to the factory once to fix a slop issue. Those are so much fun to replace on a 69 camaro with a big block and 2 inch primary headers. My March serpentine system with proper alignment and Gatorback belts squeaks like hell unless you tighten it too much(water-pump and alternator bearing killer), and then they finally admit over the phone they don't recommend running it with a mechanical fan(funny that's not mentioned in the marketing literature). "Did you try taking the fan off?" No, I didn't, but it somehow stops squeaking when I take the belts off. It's even quieter if I take your pulleys and brackets off too. And the Baer brakes 4-wheel disc kit that are famous for being 'complete' was missing parts and still doesn't have enough brake pressure after 2 different boosters and 3 different master cylinders with plenty of vacuum from the engine. And their brake pads grunted badly on the rears after 200 miles and had to be replaced. And the new Moser 12-bolt leaked, and the Powermaster starter I got couldn't turn over a lawnmower engine, and three new Holley carbs have all had serious bog issues out of the box, and the list just goes on and on and on and on.
Those smaller issues didn't really bother me cuz that crap is normal, but the engine and transmission issues piled on top of those have been a bit much. I'd say nearly 60% of the new, "quality" parts I've bought haven't worked as they're suppose to. The Summit Racing returns department must hate me.
A lot of times it isn't the part breakage that gets you the most,
it's the large amount of time and effort it takes to take the damn things out and put them back in. This multitude of parts failures has taken a lot of the fun out of it for me. There are times when I've just wanted to walk away from the hobby and get my life and wallet back. Hearing other people's stories is actually the one and only thing that has kept me going. So thanks for sharing everyone.
Now back to the garage, I need to fix some other issues.
Brian Hobaugh SCCA National Tour June 2014
First Hemi 'Cuda Convertible Ever Built
Short clips: Goodguys Pleasanton autocross and pit videos
Lately I've been telling people, "'
That's what I'm talking about right there. A simple and perfect example. A company like Edelbrock f'ing up a water pump badly like that and letting it ship. And you get to have all the fun at their expense. Water pumps are pain to replace with everything that bolts to them and the lovely mess that goes with the coolant. Now, take something like that and apply it to the whole engine or a transmission, and you get reasoning and accuracy behind the title of this thread. 
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