radrambler to be dad tommorrow

[Ummgawa]

Tom

Get some rest because for the next 21 years you are going too be eyeballin' every dude walking the planet that is 2 years older and younger than you precious daughter. I suggest coming up with a "Lock and Load" stare. Practice it alot as it will come in handy for a very long time. I have 2 girls myself and no dude walking the planet gets a free pass with my girls. My 19 year old is in college and still calls me for my approval before she goes out on a date. Remember-the first gentleman your daughter had better meet is YOU.

Blessings to you Tom!!

Jim

[XcYZ]

Good luck, Tom. You know we'll need pics.

[Streetking]

Congrats Tom!!

SW

[radrambler]

ill use this ......
thanks for the true words of wisdom
i knew i could count on you guys for everything......it went from check out the progress on my car to ... im having a girl.......what do ya think.....thanks lat -g guys

Originally Posted by Ummgawa

Tom

Get some rest because for the next 21 years you are going too be eyeballin' every dude walking the planet that is 2 years older and younger than you precious daughter. I suggest coming up with a "Lock and Load" stare. Practice it alot as it will come in handy for a very long time. I have 2 girls myself and no dude walking the planet gets a free pass with my girls. My 19 year old is in college and still calls me for my approval before she goes out on a date. Remember-the first gentleman your daughter had better meet is YOU.

Blessings to you Tom!!

Jim

[radrambler]

Originally Posted by XcYZ

Good luck, Tom. You know we'll need pics.

ill post pics tommorrow.......



radrambler

[jimhamptons]

Congratulations!

Here is the next year:

My Daughter:

Diaper Changing:

Spitup on Mommy:

Spitup on Daddy:

My Daughter:

It is all good in the end!!

Enjoy!

[T Bell]

Congrats. Take it easy and enjoy the child. We are having our 2nd in December and I can't wait. They are a joy. The woman will change though. Sorry.

[HAULNSS]

Congrats! We have a 16 month old son who is simply the greatest thing ever. Everyday is something awesome and it really makes you appreciate what your parents have done for you.

As your daughter gets a little older and starts to date, you might want to inform her dates of the following:

Rules for dating my daughter

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.


Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.


Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.


Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."


Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.


Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?


Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.


Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.


Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.



Good luck with the delivery!

Randy

[AAW]

By now you're a dad...
Congratulations!

[Ssynister13]

Haulnss - that is the greatest thing I have ever seen. Having a daughter (granted she isnt even a year old yet) I will live by those words! Thanks for sharing